Why Engagement Rings Are Kind of Silly

Photo by  Lauren Weissler

It’s the month of love. Even though statistically more people get engaged over Christmas and New Year’s, Valentine’s Day is the next most popular time to pop the question. And with that comes the timeless tradition of the diamond engagement ring. Or maybe not…

Have you guys seen this video? If you haven’t, go ahead and take a couple minutes to watch it. It’s pretty crazy. I remember feeling pretty duped when I saw it. Not that I had always had my heart set on a diamond engagement ring by any means but just because I was a part of a collective society that was hoodwinked by an ad campaign then let it become sacrosanct.

Watermelon Tourmaline Engagement Ring

Today I wear a white gold band with a watermelon tourmaline stone custom made by D Street Designs. If you believe in the whole ‘metaphysical properties of crystals’ thing, watermelon tourmaline helps to get rid of any energetic blockages in the heart. It also balances male and female energies and helps resolve issues in relationships. Seemed pretty apropos for an engagement ring stone to me!

So, just like in the video, even knowing the whole idea was a scam, we went ahead with the whole engagement ring thing anyway—albeit sans diamond. (Notice the title of the post… Why Engagement Rings are Kind of Silly!) I guess I do like the idea of a symbol. It doesn’t need to be a flashy or expensive one, but a widely recognized symbol that I’m spoken for doesn’t seem all that ridiculous to me. And hey, if it gets me a little more uninterrupted conversation with my girls while I’m at the bar, that doesn’t hurt either.

My husband and I had an interesting conversation one time about engagement and wedding rings. I kind of jokingly lamented that sometimes my ring doesn’t go with my outfit. Maybe every once in a while I’d like a flash of gold or something that would match better with my mom’s wedding ring that I wear occasionally when I want to feel fancy. He replied that because I didn’t need some crazy expensive ring, maybe he would get me a new ring every once in a while, perhaps every few years, and that I could just switch it out whenever I felt like it. That felt pretty cool to me. It’s not traditional, per se, but as we’ve seen here, what does traditional really mean?

If you’re in that teeter totter of a place with engagement rings like I am, maybe think about a non-traditional vintage ring or a custom one with a less expensive stone. They’re unique, relatively inexpensive and give you more options to find a ring that resonates with you—not just some iteration of a diamond ring that deBeers has marketed the crap out of to make you believe that you need so you can keep up with the Joneses.

Here are some of my favorites in the shop…

Where do you stand? Diamond/no diamond? Ring/no ring? What resonates with you when it comes to the idea of engagement rings?